Unit 6 - My personal Integral Assessment
As I get older I find that I am assessing my life as a whole, but also assessing all the variables that contribute to my feeling of happiness, alot more often than I used to. I am in this place in my life that I only want variables, friends, experiences and moments that make me content and happy. As I explained in an earlier post I had to recently assess my life and the lack of focus that I was having towards school and my classes. During those same five weeks that I lacked focus and enthusiasm for my education, just happened to be the five weeks that me and my husband and several of our friends were traveling on what seemed like perpetual vacation over six weeks. We started in Seattle for a long weekend, then went to Burningman for 10 days, then it was off to Colorado to see friends, then off to Vegas for 4 days, then it was Palm Springs for 3 days, then we went to Boston to see friends for 5 days. We returned home just in time for the first home, Arizona Cardinal, game of which we have season tickets. By the time I actually got the last suitcase unpacked and could catch my breath I realized that I needed to really assess how trying to accomodate all of my friends need to see me on their turf, really adds more stress along with a feeling that I am overwhelmingly behind on everything in my life. In reality I would probably enjoy our travels alot more if there were less of them and we were somewhere for more than 72 hours and in a blur the whole time. Not only does it eventually take a toll on my physical wellbeing, but I begin to loose myself in all the parties and all the people. Not to mention that it takes away from my ability to do my assignments in the time and manner that I really want to. So the aspect of my life that is in need of tweaking is my worldly life. I need to make more time for me and those things that make me happy, and less time trying to accomodate all the people in my life. If they are truly my genuine friends then our relationship will not be any less special because they see less often. The other aspect of my life that is a constant source of stress is my biological life in terms of keeping my integrity with my personal trainer and my exercise goal, as well as eating better and more often and not drinking as much. It is so easy for the social me to rationalize a drink at dinner or going to happy hour with friends, while the "trying to be healthy the right way me" is kicking herself because I know that I will never achieve the level of health and fitness that I want if I don't make some drastic changes and stick to them.
For me to achieve the changes that I would like to see in my worldly life and my biological life really requires me to stay focused on the goal at hand and be willing to make whatever sacrifices are needed to achieve Integral Health within all four quadrants of my life. I need to make a committement to myself and keep my word to myself no matter what. I know that by staying dedicated to my exercise routine and diet I will feel better and look amazing and that is what I want more than I want Happy Hour with my friends. I have a creative side of me that often gets put on the back burner because we are traveling all the time. I have to make time to do my hobbies, because they fulfill my need for self expression and adds happiness and enjoyment to my life.
Hey Andrea. Sounds like you have been having some fun but it also sounds like your a little at war with yourself. I remember my first try at college, I was just too busy having fun, partying with friends, traveling, working and spending more time on my mountain bike along the river bottom than anything else. I thought that I was going to be that guy living in a van down by the river. All the while this was going on, I had this image of me and my wellness and where I wanted to be. I was feeling like what you were describing. This made me different than my friends, although we would all sit around and party, smoke out daily, I had this love for life that I didn´t see in my friends. I think their couch riding made me even more active than what I already was. I started seeing who my real friends were and people who it was just fun to party with. This was all part of growing up and while I still have many buddies, I only have a few true friends. I´m jealous that you have season tickets to the 4 n´0 Cards. Although I predict a loss against the Vikings on Oct 21. I can´t wait. Don´t stress too much about where you want to be in life, just be yourself and it will all work out.
ReplyDeleteHi Andrea,
ReplyDeleteReading your blog I had to chuckle at how your situation and mine are the opposite! While you are struggling with the demands of friends and activities, I feel that is what I am lacking due to so many commitments from balancing school and work. I used to have so much more time to see friends and do things, but that has been put on the back burner. It is hard to find a balance!
WoW what a trip i would have love to take a trip like that with my wife thats a mind relaxing alone just being away from home and the stress just being home ,did you enjoy yourself just relaxing on the road is so healing to the body ,mind and soul .
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